Louisa
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| 05-04-2011 8:48 PM |
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| Yes and I'm very excited. The Literati festival dinner on the Friday night sounds intriguing as authors are asked to move from table to table so they meet as many people as possible. I think it's a great idea. Hope I don't get indigestion! |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 8:50 PM |
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OK, Racers
We're down to the final 10 minutes.
Full steam ahead to the finish! |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 8:52 PM |
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I'l definitely look out for you and say g'day.
Remind me to email you a photo of myself so you don't look out for a sweet-faced blonde girl with a parrot. :) |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Peter
Posts:448
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| 05-04-2011 8:53 PM |
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| Alas, those places are a bit far for me. I went to the local writers' festival last year, and was lucky enough to be sitting beside a publisher at the dinner! He asked me to submit my MS (which I did), but I think his company has since folded. :( |
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http://writer.catplace.net |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 8:55 PM |
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| Where are you based, Peter? |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Peter
Posts:448
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| 05-04-2011 8:56 PM |
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| I'm somewhere between Albury and Melbourne. |
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http://writer.catplace.net |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 8:57 PM |
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| I'm a country Victorian myself. But now I live in Brisbane. :) |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 8:58 PM |
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| Last couple of minutes, Racers! |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 9:00 PM |
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OK, Everyone, that's time!
Who would like to report on what they achieved this hour?
I'm ashamed to say that I'm still sitting at the starting line - I got distracted by the conversation. |
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Karyn Markwell |
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bill (guest)
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| 05-04-2011 9:02 PM |
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| think i managed to do some work ok in getting it ready for my agent. but i might go back and re write the start. appreciatted l.a.s suggestions on strong opening. relaise mine isnt strong enough. so might work on that through the week and see how i go. |
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Louisa
Posts:20
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| 05-04-2011 9:02 PM |
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| Going back to our earlier conversation about the opening chapter... I can recommend a book called The First Five Pages by Noah Lukeman. I read it when I first started writing novels. A lot of what he talks about might seem very obvious but sometimes we all get so caught up in our work that we can’t see the wood for the trees and we need to take a step back and ask questions like, Am I using clichés? Am I overusing adjectives and should I be using adverbs at all? Have I identified clearly who is the central character in the early chapters and have I allowed the reader time to get to know him or her? Is my dialogue realistic but not mundane? Does it flow well when I read it aloud? And the biggie…do I show the reader, rather than tell? It's a good book to flick through. |
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bill (guest)
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| 05-04-2011 9:02 PM |
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question for l.a.
does the ending need to be as strong as a start. or can we leave the reader on the edge and hope them to buy our next book. |
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Dawn
Posts:248
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| 05-04-2011 9:04 PM |
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Oh Peter, sorry to hear that the publisher has disappeared - I remember when you were submitting to him. Bad luck...
I edited about 2 paragraphs, not very much :( I'll keep going while I make dinner...
Have fun at the writers festivals - I won't be there either, being based in WA. If anyone's in Perth, I am very excited to be talking in the same workshop as Shaun Tan on writing in our psychiatry conference next month :) |
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Dawn
www.psychiatristparent.wordpress.com
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Peter
Posts:448
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| 05-04-2011 9:04 PM |
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I didn't do what I intended to. Instead, I went back and further tweaked some early chapters regarding my protagonist's awareness of his tendency to be dismissive of alternative points of view. The rough edges still need work, but here's some:
‘What rubbish!’ Jason made a motion like he was cocking a pistol, and fired off an imaginary round into the back of Jane’s head. Bugger! he thought, even before he’d finished.
‘Jason, I’m not going to tell you again,’ said Ms McWilliam. ‘Play nice, or don’t play at all.’
‘I know. I’m sorry. But it is rubbish! I’ve seen graphs in science magazines showing how much hotter—’
‘Just cool it, Jason. Actually, you’re both right.’ She turned and wrote some more on the board: ‘Higher tax. Some evidence of warming.’
The discussion continued, and Jason did his best to tune it out. The list of issues grew to fill the whole board, but Jason had taken off his glasses so that he couldn’t read it.
Finally, the classroom fell silent. Jason dared to put on his glasses again and looked at his watch. If I can just ignore this for another fifteen minutes…
‘Okay, people, that’s a pretty good list of issues,’ said Ms McWilliam. ‘As you can see, some points suggest that global warming could be really serious, but there’s also some points suggesting the opposite. Since there’s points on each side, what should we do?’
Jason remained silent. He’d had quite enough attention already. And with a reputation as a borderline geek, it wouldn’t do to show everyone just how much he knew about the subject.
But that concern didn’t stop Emma. How come girls never got classified as geeks? It didn’t seem fair.
‘Since warming isn’t obvious yet, we don’t need to do anything at all yet. We should just keep going like we are now, and wait and see what happens. When it’s obvious that we need to do something, then we can. That way, people can keep their jobs and use their cars and boats, at least for a while.’
Jason boiled. ‘That’s stupid! The longer we wait, the harder it’ll be to fix!’
Did he just call Emma stupid? Damn it! She was cute, too. How come he couldn’t just shut up? |
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http://writer.catplace.net |
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Gemma (guest)
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| 05-04-2011 9:04 PM |
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I'm so happy with what I achieved: 512 words, so I met my goal.
But it's all pretty unpolished. Still, it's nice to have them down on paper, so to speak. |
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Louisa
Posts:20
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| 05-04-2011 9:06 PM |
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| Gotta have a good ending! I can't stand it when I read the end of a story and feel the author hasn't bothered to pull together a cracker of a conclusion. It's always nice if there's a little surprise as well. |
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Dawn
Posts:248
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| 05-04-2011 9:06 PM |
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| Thanks for the book tip Louisa - I think he wrote a book I have called The Art of Punctuation (my husband said I had reached a new geek level when I bought that book!). i will look out for it. |
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Dawn
www.psychiatristparent.wordpress.com
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 9:06 PM |
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Thanks for suggesting that book, Louisa - it sounds like a great guide to refer to as you need it.
How did you go with your speech? |
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Karyn Markwell |
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Karyn
Posts:334
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| 05-04-2011 9:07 PM |
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Well done for editing those two paragraphs, Dawn - often that part can take forever!
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Karyn Markwell |
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Dawn
Posts:248
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| 05-04-2011 9:08 PM |
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This is all I got done...
Tony held Jessie’s lead loosely in his hand and walked along the path past the beach. The sun was only just coming up, and the only people around were a few surfers, and a few straggling backpackers on their way back to their hostel after a night out. Tony headed north, past the golf course. He looked to his right and saw swirls of pink appearing between the grey sky and the black ocean. It was going to be a beautiful autumn day. How ironic. He shook his head at himself. What weather would be appropriate for Matthew’s funeral? Pouring rain, a relentless drizzle, howling wind? As if the weather cared about what he was going through.
By the time he reached the cliff side path, dabs of orange had spread along the horizon, and the sea was turning blue. Anna used to love this walk. She always wanted to live in one of the houses whose gardens pushed out into the cliff reserve, to be able to look out and see nothing but the ocean. Is that why she’d gone to those cliffs? Was she looking for that peace, that space? Why not here, why drive half an hour away? Tony rubbed his eyes with his free hand. Maybe she hadn’t wanted to be found.
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Dawn
www.psychiatristparent.wordpress.com
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